Japanese Birth Customs & Ceremonies: A Cultural Guide for Foreign Families in Japan

May 31, 2026 Maternity Prep Navigator Editorial ~20 min read

When you have a baby in Japan, you will likely encounter a range of customs and ceremonies that are woven into the culture of welcoming new life. Some are rooted in Shinto traditions, others in Buddhist customs, and many are simply long-standing family practices that have been passed down through generations without any particular religious meaning. As a foreign family, you may be asked to take part in some of these ceremonies — or you may simply be curious about what they are. This guide explains the most common customs: what they mean, when they typically happen, and how much participation is expected. The key thing to know upfront: almost all of these customs are optional, and how much you choose to observe them is entirely up to your family. For a broader overview of giving birth in Japan, see our guide: Having a Baby in Japan — English Guide Hub.

1. Overview: the spirit behind Japanese birth customs

Japanese birth customs share a common spirit: they are fundamentally about wishing the baby good health, welcoming them into the family and community, and marking the passage of time with gratitude. Many customs involve visiting a Shinto shrine or a Buddhist temple, though in practice many Japanese families observe the outward form of these traditions without a strong religious commitment. Non-religious families and families of other faiths can usually participate in adapted or simplified ways, or simply skip customs that do not feel right for them.

One of the most important things for foreign families to know is that these customs are not rigid rules. Japan has enormous regional variation — what is standard practice in one prefecture may be unfamiliar in another. There is also significant variation between families, and between generations within the same family. What your Japanese in-laws consider essential may be something that another family has never done. This guide describes what is generally observed across Japan, but your specific situation will depend on your family and the region where you live.

You are not expected to master all of these traditions overnight. Most Japanese people are genuinely understanding when foreign family members are unfamiliar with customs, and most ceremonies have no single "correct" way to observe them. When in doubt, asking your partner, midwife, or a trusted Japanese friend for guidance is always a good approach.

2. Anzan Kigan and the Day of the Dog (Inu no Hi)

Around the fifth month of pregnancy — traditionally understood as the point at which the pregnancy is stabilizing — many Japanese families observe a custom called obi-iwai (帯祝い), also known as anzan kigan (安産祈願), meaning "prayer for safe childbirth." The central element is visiting a Shinto shrine to receive a blessing, and the ceremony is traditionally held on a day in that month that falls on the Day of the Dog (inu no hi) in the traditional Japanese calendar cycle. Dogs are associated in Japanese culture with easy delivery, as they are said to give birth smoothly.

As part of this ceremony, some families wrap a cloth sash called a hara-obi (腹帯) around the pregnant woman's belly. The tradition holds that wearing this sash is auspicious and is connected to the safe-birth prayer. Please note that this is a cultural custom only: the editorial team makes no claims about any medical or physical effect of wearing a belly sash. Whether to wear one, what kind, and how — if at all — is entirely a personal and family choice. Your obstetrician is the right person to consult for any medically relevant questions about abdominal support during pregnancy.

For foreign families, the anzan kigan shrine visit is entirely optional. If your Japanese in-laws place great importance on it, participating even in a simplified way can be a meaningful gesture of connection. If attending a Shinto shrine does not feel comfortable for religious or other reasons, most Japanese families are understanding. You can also visit the shrine without participating in any religious ritual — simply being present and respectful is generally sufficient if you are accompanying family members.

The specific shrine to visit is usually one that is local and well-known for safe-childbirth prayers. There is no single required shrine; families typically go to a shrine that is meaningful to them or convenient to reach. Some families choose to do a simplified version at home rather than visit a shrine. For more on the overall flow of pregnancy in Japan, see: Pregnancy and Childbirth in Japan: An Overview.

3. Why big pre-birth celebrations are uncommon in Japan

If you are from a country where baby showers and large pre-birth celebrations are common, you may notice that these are much less typical in Japan. This reflects a cultural tendency to be cautious about celebrating before a baby is safely born. In the traditional Japanese view, making large-scale preparations or holding big gatherings before birth can be seen as getting ahead of events in a way that may invite misfortune — a concept sometimes described informally as being concerned about "counting chickens before they hatch," though the cultural logic runs deeper than this.

This does not mean that Japanese families do not prepare practically for a baby's arrival — they absolutely do, and thorough preparation of baby goods is normal and expected. The distinction is more about large public celebrations and gift-receiving events before the birth. Keeping preparations lower-key and celebrating more fully after the baby arrives safely is the traditional approach.

It is worth noting that this norm has been changing, particularly in urban areas and among younger generations. Baby showers are becoming more common in Japan, especially among women with international connections or in international workplaces. Whether to hold a pre-birth celebration is entirely up to you — but if you are navigating expectations with your Japanese in-laws or colleagues, it may be helpful to know the cultural background.

4. Oshichiya and naming the baby (Meimei)

On the seventh day after birth, Japanese families traditionally observe oshichiya (お七夜), a naming ceremony in which the baby's name is formally announced. The name is often written on a meimeisho (命名書), a calligraphic name card, which may be displayed in the home. The oshichiya is typically a quiet family gathering — not a large public event — and the naming card is often displayed near the baby's sleeping area. Depending on the family, a simple celebratory meal may be shared.

The oshichiya is the occasion on which the baby's name is traditionally announced, though in practice many families decide the name earlier and simply confirm it on this day. For international families, choosing a name that works across both languages — or choosing separate names for each cultural context — is a common and perfectly accepted approach. There is no official requirement to use this naming ceremony; it is a family tradition, not a legal formality.

The legal requirement is to file a birth registration (shusshou todoke) within 14 days of birth at the local ward or city office. The oshichiya ceremony and the legal registration are separate things. For more detail on the birth registration process and the overall flow of post-birth paperwork, see: Pregnancy and Childbirth in Japan: An Overview.

5. Omiyamairi: the first shrine visit

Omiyamairi (お宮参り) is the traditional first shrine visit for the newborn, typically held around 30–33 days after birth for boys and 31–33 days for girls, though the exact timing varies by region and family, and many families choose a date that is simply convenient. The purpose is to introduce the baby to the local deity (ujigami) and to give thanks for the safe arrival.

At the shrine, the family typically requests a brief Shinto blessing ceremony from a priest. The baby is often dressed in a ceremonial robe called ubugi (産着), sometimes provided or lent by the grandparents. A donation called hatsuho-ryou (初穂料) is offered to the shrine for the blessing ceremony. The amount varies considerably by shrine and region — there is no fixed national standard. If you want to know the expected amount at a specific shrine, calling the shrine office in advance to ask is entirely normal and appropriate. A common approach is to prepare an envelope in the range typically mentioned by the shrine, keeping in mind that customs vary.

For foreign families, the omiyamairi is one of the ceremonies that Japanese grandparents often have strong feelings about — it is the first public introduction of the grandchild, and for many grandparents it is a meaningful and emotionally significant event. Even if a full Shinto ceremony does not feel personally meaningful to you, attending as a supportive presence for the grandparents and for the photographs is often appreciated. Conversely, if attending a shrine is not possible for religious or logistical reasons, most families can adapt — some families hold a similar gathering at a park, garden, or family home instead.

The 30-day timeframe reflects a traditional idea that the mother and baby should rest at home for a period after birth. In practice, timing is flexible; if the mother or baby is not well, the visit is simply postponed. For guidance on postpartum recovery, see: Postpartum Recovery in Japan: Confinement, Satogaeri, and Postnatal Care.

6. Okuizome: the 100-day first-meal ceremony

Okuizome (お食い初め) is a ceremony held around the 100th day after birth — though the exact day varies and is often chosen for convenience. The name means roughly "first eating," and the ceremony involves symbolically offering the baby their first ceremonial meal, with the wish that they will never go hungry throughout their life. In practice, the baby cannot yet eat solid food at this stage; an adult (often the oldest grandparent present) mimes the act of feeding each dish to the baby.

The traditional okuizome meal has a set composition that includes ceremonial rice, a clear soup, seasonal side dishes, and — most distinctively — a small stone called a hagatame no ishi (teeth-hardening stone). The stone is gently touched to the baby's lips with the wish that they will grow strong teeth. The stone is sometimes provided by the venue if you hold the ceremony at a restaurant, or it can be a small smooth pebble collected from a river or shrine.

The meal and ceremony can be observed at home or at a restaurant. Many restaurants in Japan offer okuizome set menus during this period. You can also purchase a ready-made okuizome meal set online or from department store food halls. The level of formality ranges from a simple home meal to a large multi-generational family gathering. There is no single correct way to observe this ceremony — the key spirit is the shared wish for the baby's health and nourishment.

7. Shussan Iwai and Uchiiwai: celebration gifts and return gifts

Shussan iwai (出産祝い) are the gifts given by friends, relatives, and colleagues to celebrate a new birth. In Japan, it is customary for the new parents to send a return gift called uchiiwai (内祝い), also known as okaeshi (お返し). This return gift is typically sent within about one month of the birth, often around the time of or shortly after the omiyamairi.

The general custom is to return a gift worth approximately half the value of what was received, though this is a general guideline rather than a fixed rule, and practice varies by relationship, region, and generation. Common choices for uchiiwai include food items, sweets, household goods, or catalog gifts that allow the recipient to choose their own item. It is customary to attach a card with the baby's name and date of birth, along with a note of thanks.

The amounts involved in shussan iwai gifts vary considerably by relationship and context. Close family members and long-time friends may give considerably more than colleagues or acquaintances. General guidelines that circulate in Japan are just that — guidelines — and actual amounts depend on the specific relationship and personal circumstances. If you are unsure what to give as a shussan iwai, asking a trusted Japanese friend for context-specific advice is a reasonable approach.

For foreign families, the uchiiwai custom can feel like a lot to manage in the first weeks after birth on top of recovery and newborn care. It is perfectly acceptable to send return gifts a little later than the traditional one-month window — most people are understanding. The gesture of acknowledgment matters more than the exact timing.

8. Postpartum recovery and Satogaeri Shussan

Traditionally in Japan, the early postpartum period involved a concept similar to confinement — a period of rest during which the mother stays at home to recover. The idea of tokoage (床上げ), literally "getting up from the bed," marked the end of this rest period, though this formal custom has become less common in modern life. The underlying value — that postpartum recovery requires genuine rest and support — remains culturally significant and is still reflected in how many Japanese families approach the weeks after birth.

A related practice that remains common is satogaeri shussan (里帰り出産), which refers to the custom of a pregnant woman returning to her parents' home (satogaeri means "returning to one's parents' home") for the period around the birth. This may involve giving birth at a hospital near the parents' home and staying for several weeks postpartum, with the support of the mother's own parents. The logistics — when to travel, how long to stay, what support the husband can provide — vary considerably by family situation and geography.

For international families, satogaeri shussan may not be possible in the traditional sense if the mother's family is overseas. Some international families adapt this by having a parent come to Japan to help, or by using postnatal care facilities (sango kea shisetsu) available in Japan. For a detailed guide to postpartum options and recovery support in Japan, see: Postpartum Recovery in Japan: Confinement, Satogaeri, and Postnatal Care.

It is important to note that this article does not make any medical claims about the duration or method of postpartum recovery. The need for rest and support after birth is medically recognized, but the specific practices described here are cultural traditions. For medical guidance on postpartum recovery, consult your doctor or midwife.

9. First milestones: Hatsuzekku, first birthday, and Isshoumochi

Hatsuzekku (first seasonal festival)

Hatsuzekku (初節句) refers to the first seasonal festival a child experiences after their birth. In Japan, Hinamatsuri (Doll's Day) on 3 March is associated with girls, and Kodomo no Hi (Children's Day) on 5 May is associated with boys. Families with a newborn girl may set up traditional hina dolls, and families with a newborn boy may display koi nobori (carp streamers) or warrior dolls. These displays are often a significant purchase, and grandparents — particularly on the maternal side — traditionally contribute to buying them, though customs vary widely by family and region. There is no single rule about who buys what; discussing expectations openly with both sets of grandparents early on can help avoid misunderstandings.

First birthday and Isshoumochi

The first birthday is celebrated across many cultures, and Japan is no exception. One distinctively Japanese element of the first birthday is the isshoumochi (一升餅) tradition. A round rice cake weighing approximately one shou (about 1.8 kg) is prepared, and the baby is asked to carry or walk with it on their back — the weight being quite significant for a one-year-old. The wish expressed is that the child will never go hungry and will always have enough in life. The isshoumochi can be purchased from rice cake shops or ordered online, and some families observe the ceremony in a simplified way with a smaller version.

Half-birthday celebrations (at six months) are not a traditional Japanese custom but have become more popular in recent years, particularly in urban areas and among families with international connections. Whether to observe a half-birthday is entirely up to the family.

10. Navigating customs as a foreign family

One of the most common questions from foreign families in Japan is: "Do we have to do all of this?" The short answer is no. All of the customs described in this article are optional. None of them are legal requirements. None of them have a single correct way of being observed. And in virtually every case, Japanese families — including your Japanese in-laws, if applicable — are generally understanding when a foreign family member is unfamiliar with a tradition or wishes to adapt it.

That said, some of these ceremonies are more emotionally significant to your Japanese family members than others. Omiyamairi and okuizome, in particular, tend to be occasions that Japanese grandparents look forward to as meaningful family milestones. Even if the ceremonies themselves do not feel significant to you personally, showing up, sharing the moment, and letting the grandparents take photographs can go a long way toward building goodwill and family connection. The ceremony is often less about the ritual itself and more about gathering the family around the baby.

If you and your partner come from different cultural or religious backgrounds, it is worth having an open conversation early — ideally during pregnancy — about which customs you would like to observe, adapt, or skip. This conversation is easier to have in advance than in the postpartum period when everyone is tired and emotions are running high. When both sets of grandparents have different expectations, being clear and consistent about which customs you will observe, and framing it as "this is how we want to do it as a family," is a reasonable approach.

You do not need to feel pressure to perform traditions perfectly, or to observe customs that genuinely conflict with your own values or religious beliefs. Japan has a strong tradition of accommodating diverse approaches to these ceremonies. Non-religious families, families of different faiths, and families who adapt these customs in their own way all find their place. The underlying intention — welcoming your baby with love and wishing them well — is universal, and that spirit can be expressed in whatever form feels right for your family.

If you want practical support navigating communication with your Japanese doctors or the healthcare system as you prepare for the birth, see: Communicating with Japanese Doctors: A Practical Guide for Foreign Moms.

11. FAQ

Do we have to visit a Shinto shrine for the ceremonies? We are not Shinto.

No, you are not required to visit a shrine. Many Japanese families — including those with no particular religious affiliation — visit shrines for ceremonies like anzan kigan and omiyamairi as cultural traditions rather than religious acts. If attending a shrine does not feel comfortable for religious reasons, it is entirely acceptable to skip or adapt these ceremonies. Some families hold a simple gathering at home or in a meaningful place instead. Your Japanese partner or in-laws will almost certainly understand if you explain your situation respectfully.

When exactly should we send the uchiiwai (return gift)?

The general guideline is within about one month of birth, often around or shortly after the omiyamairi. However, this is a guideline rather than a strict rule. Many new parents find it logistically difficult to organize return gifts during the first weeks of newborn care and recovery. Sending them a little later — within six to eight weeks — is generally well understood. The key is that you do send a return gift eventually, and that you acknowledge the original gift with a card or message even if the gift itself is slightly delayed.

Are there customs specifically for twins?

The same general customs apply for twins, though the practicalities are doubled. For okuizome, for example, ideally a separate ceremonial setting is prepared for each baby. For isshoumochi, there are no fixed rules — some families prepare one rice cake, others prepare one per child. The spirit of the ceremony matters more than the exact format. Discuss with your family what feels right and practical for your situation.

My baby was born in winter and the omiyamairi falls in very cold weather. Can we delay it?

Yes, absolutely. The timing of omiyamairi is a guideline, not a strict requirement. If the weather is very cold, if the baby or mother is unwell, or if timing is inconvenient for family members to gather, it is entirely normal to postpone the shrine visit to a warmer or more convenient day. The important thing is the intention, not the exact calendar date. Many families hold the ceremony whenever it works for everyone involved.

We are an international couple and our families are in different countries. Can we still observe these customs?

Yes, and many international families find creative ways to adapt. Video calls during oshichiya and okuizome, sharing photographs with overseas family members, or holding a "blended" celebration that incorporates elements of both cultural traditions are all approaches that work well in practice. The ceremonies are fundamentally about welcoming the baby and sharing joy with the people who love them — that intention translates across any distance or cultural background.